this is so stupid why am in tears
Not a single one of these kids were alive when American Psycho came out and they've now strangled ANY CHANCE of a reboot in its crib
hey man i get that it’s your thing but you are making people uncomfortable by, and these are your words, “blair witching it” in the corner
sometimes i think about the history of coffee culture in islam and how it spread like it’s so funny
- discovered by sufis who decided it was a miracle from Allah since it allowed them to stay up late into the night for night worship
- miracle beans = UNLIMITED DHIKR
- cue scholars debating for years about whether it’s haram or halal and if it should be classified as an ‘intoxicant’ or not
- fast forward to 16th century ottoman empire, where a woman had the legal right to divorce her husband if he failed to provide her with enough coffee
- europeans called it the “mohammaden gruel” or “devil’s drink” bc they believed it to be a “bitter invention of satan and his followers”
- fast forward to pope clement viii finally giving in and tasting it to see what the hype is about and then stating: “This Satan’s drink is so delicious that it would be a pity to let the infidels have exclusive use of it.”
- pope clement viii then proceeds to BAPTIZE THE COFFEE BEANS
What was your first source of portable music? Walkman? CD player with headphones? MP3 Player? iPod? Phone?

presumably anti skip technology has evolved since then and actually reliably works now (if you jolt a cd drive when it’s playing the laser reading it will also jolt around and songs will skip - not useful when walking. anti skip technology is meant to stabilise so it doesn’t happen. very rarely was this actually the fucking case)
you’d carry around a little flip folder of CDs like this in your bag
often containing at least one mixtape cd you burned yourself, or that someone else had made you, with the tracklist written on it in sharpie
common from the late 90s - early/mid 00s when MP3 players and iPods started to take over
just so it shows up in the notes: this is an extremely good thing, which is why you will see the internet/cell companies revolt against it-- it will prevent them from selling your data to spamcall companies and selectively throttling their competitor's sites, among other things.
also remember that the internet has basically replaced phone service entirely now, with most phones now simply operating via VOIP. legislating the internet the same way as landlines were is really a no-brainer, it's the same service in a slightly different form.
Now you can understand how it sounds when i hear any siren
art
tornado sirens normally: 📢⚠️🌪 THERES A TORNADO 📢💥❗️
these tornado sirens: 💫🌸✨ there's a tornado 🥰 🌈🌱
✨😻💖🎶four tornadoes 🎶💖😻✨
Okay we don't get tornadoes in Wales so I am admittedly unsure of the etiquette but if four of the fuckers are going off simultaneously should he not be staying in a house right now
Tornados move fast and are erratic
it's best to get in a storm cellar or the most internal room of your house
So... not wandering around outside making a Tiktok of the pretty sound?
Categories of answers I have received to this question:
- It's probably just Wednesday
- It's probably a test (context clues suggest these two answers are related)
- Yeah but you have to go outside to see the pretty clouds first
- It's fine, the tornado is probably the other side of the town
- Mid-westerners have no self-preservation instincts and like to watch the houses fly past
Thank you to everyone who submitted this data for my analysis, my conclusion is that I don't understand America
MURICA YEAH
Geography.
So basically, what we have that Europe doesn’t is ocean followed by A GIANT-ASS WINDBREAK (the Rocky Mountains). To give you a concept of how big the Rockies are: I live in the Valley of the Sun, aka the Phoenix Metro area. We are surrounded on all four sides by mountains: the White Tanks to the west, the McDowell Range to the northeast, the South Mountains to the, well, south, and the Sierra Estrellas to the southwest. I live thirty miles from the White Tanks. If I go about a mile out of my subdivision, so I actually have a clear range of view not blocked by houses on all sides, I CAN SEE THEM. Faintly, it needs to be a low-pollution day, but they’re still quite large from my view. The atmosphere literally gets in the way before they get too far away to see due to size.
So you’ve got an idea what that looks like, right? You can kind of imagine that in your head?
THE ROCKIES ARE ALMOST FOUR TIMES BIGGER.
And on the far side of the Rockies….it’s just flat land. For thousands of miles.
Behold, Kansas.
(That’s not a joke, by the way. This is a photograph of the Kansan prairie.)
So any windy weather that makes it over the Rockies actually has to be coming down. Like out of the sky. It’s gonna hit the east side of the Rockies like a skier and go zoom. And then once you get into the Midwest, there’s just…nothing to stop that wind from creating some pretty gnarly weather systems. It’s not humid (for the most part) because there are no oceans or huge lakes. There are no giant geological features to get in the way, and no, a city does not count as a giant geological feature. In geologic terms, New York City is a bit noticeable (mostly because it’s a heat sink). Places like St. Louis and Topeka might as well not exist when you’re talking on a scale like that.
Thus: tornadoes. Because there are no mountains to stop them.






















